Little House: "Back to School"

And now it's time for the Most Awesome Thing I Saw on TV Last Week. The most awesome thing I saw on TV last week was a two-part episode of Little House on the Prairie where Laura falls in love with Almanzo. It starts out with Nellie graduating from school because she took her exams early (this is important later), and then her parents buy her a restaurant to try to make her more attractive for a husband, which proves that even Nellie's parents know that Nellie is a stone cold bitch. Anyway, Laura meets the new teacher's brother, Almanzo, and thinks he's so dreamy that when he says that she can call him by his nickname, Manny, she accidentally calls him Manly. Hee! Although it's weird that he claimed his nickname was Manny since not one person on the show (except Laura) ever calls him anything but Almanzo. But then Harriet Olson gets wind of a new bachelor in town and tries to set him up with Nellie for a dinner date. The only problem is that Nellie can't cook. So Laura volunteers to cook the dinner secretly, and Almanzo says he wants cinnamon chicken, which sounds totally disgusting if you ask me, and Laura substitutes cayenne pepper for the cinnamon, with predictably slapstick results for Nellie and Almanzo's date. But Almanzo wasn't into Nellie anyway, so it all worked out for everyone but Nellie. And Harriet.

Then Ma and Pa make Laura apologize to Nellie, and Harriet gasps and tsks and it's pretty awesome, but Laura runs away when they try to get her to apologize to Almanzo. So Pa has a heart-to-heart with Laura and tells her that she's not an adult yet, but that she will be when she becomes a teacher.

Laura, as usual, takes this totally literally and decides that she needs to graduate and become a teacher immediately. So she borrows Nellie's books to study, and Nellie tells Laura that there wasn't any history on the exam when she took it. So then Laura studies everything but history and on the day of the exam, Almanzo wishes her luck with a kiss on the forehead. Nellie sees this and tells Almanzo that she's going to bring him some cookies at his house later that day. So Laura takes the test -- which of course has a ton of history questions on it -- and runs out crying. As she's sitting in the woods having a good cry, she spots Nellie walking back from her cookie delivery to Almanzo. So Nellie totally rubs it in that she was at Almanzo's house, and Laura confonts Nellie about the history lie, and Nellie smarms it up, and Laura grabs Nellie and tosses her into a nearby pond. So then they start wrestling in the mud! And it was so awesome! And just to make it better, Almanzo picks that moment to drive by and breaks up the fight and Nellie says that Laura will be sorry, and Almanzo takes Laura to his house to get cleaned up, which prompts an excellent slow burn which leads up to a full-fledged temper tantrum from Nellie complete with flailing about in the mud. And the music in the background was a zany version of "Wait 'Til The Sun Shines, Nellie" so props to the music department. So then Harriet shows Ma and Pa how muddy Nellie is and they totally laugh, so Nellie says that Laura attacked her because Nellie saw Laura and Almanzo kissing. So Pa gets all pissed off and takes off to Almanzo's house with Jonathan Garvey. So Pa knocks on the door and starts punching Almanzo. Laura explains what happened, and Almanzo says that Laura's just a little girl. So Pa and Laura both feel like crap. Pa apologizes to Almanzo, and Laura yells that she's a woman, and then runs out and slams the door, because that's an adult thing to do. Which Ma points out, and tells Laura to start acting like a woman if she wants Almanzo to notice her. So then Pa and Laura make up and go fishing, and Laura voice-overs that she knew someday she would be Laura Ingalls Wilder, although frankly, the way Almanzo was portrayed in the show, I'm not sure why Laura thought he was such a good catch, but then again her alternatives were, like, Willie Olson or Albert, I guess. But the whole thing was awesome.